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Forum "Korrekturlesen" - Buchvorstellung
Buchvorstellung < Korrekturlesen < Englisch < Sprachen < Vorhilfe
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Buchvorstellung: Korrektur lesen
Status: (Frage) beantwortet Status 
Datum: 16:17 Mo 22.01.2018
Autor: cheezy

Aufgabe
Hallo Freunde,

habe morgen eine Buchvorstellung von "East of Eden" ...

Kann mir jemand bitte meine Buchvorstellung korrektur lesen? :)

Danke

I chose the book "East of Eden" from John Steinbeck. It is a roman and it was released in the year 1952.

The book is divided in 4 parts.

The first part of the roman is told about the brothers Charles and Adam, who are fighting for the love of their father Cyrus Trask. They have a bad childhood. Charles is very jealousy of his brother Adam. Charles fought with Adam and he went to the army for 5 years. After the 5 years army he did not want to return home, because he is frighten of his brother. So he stays further 5 years in the army. Then Adam went through America and caught by the police. Then he went back to his home. But Charles spoke with him and wanted to know, whiy his father had loved him more. Adam said thath he never loved his father. Then they plan what they will do with the heritage of their father. Then Adam get know a woman whose name is Cathy. Cathy is bad person, but Adam did not know that. She got pregnant and she brought 2 siblings in the world. Then she left him alone and she worked as a prostititute. Then Adam and his chinese butler raise the 2 children. They gave the name of the siblings Caleb and Aaron. Then his butler said to him that he should look after a new woman or he should regret for her. THen he wents to the brothel and found Cathy. Then Cathy said that his brother could be the father of their children.

Then Adam wanted to start a new life. He bought a new car and he took care of his children. Then he wrote a letter to his brother Chartles but he got a bad message that his brother is dead.

Then the 2 sons Caleb and Aaron raises in brother rivalry. They asked themselves, where their mother is. But the chinese butler and Adam lied that their mother is dead. But the siblings gehts other rumors, that their mother is working as a prostitute in Salina.

Adam Trask lost the most of his money in a bad business idea. Aaron wanted to move away and he studied in the university Horvard. He returned back to his father because of homesickness. Caleb has known more about his mother and he knew that she is a prostitute. If Aaron knows that he would break inside. Something bad goes in Caleb head and he took Aaron to the brothel, where his mother is working. He saw his mother and ran away. Then Cal went to themilitary service. Then Cathy made suicid and Adam cryied a lot. The whole owner of the heritage of the mother belongs to Aaron. Then Adam asked Caled where his brother is and he asked similar like Kain in the bible... .
He said Should i take care of him. But now also Caled is frighten of his brother.

After a time Aaron died and his father got a stroke.

On the sickbed his father put the blame of the death of Aaron on Caleb.


        
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Buchvorstellung: Antwort
Status: (Antwort) fertig Status 
Datum: 20:06 Mo 22.01.2018
Autor: mmhkt

Hallo cheezy,
einige Anmerkungen und Vorschläge ohne Anspruch auf Vollständigkeit.



>  I chose the book "East of Eden" from (korrekt: "by") John Steinbeck. It is
> a Roman (korrekt: "novel" - bitte auch im folgenden Text ändern) and it was released in the year ("the year" kannst du weglassen) 1952.
>  
> The book is divided in 4 parts.
>  
> The first part of the roman is told about (besser "deals with") the brothers
> Charles and Adam, who are fighting for the love of their
> father Cyrus Trask. They have ("have" nur dann, wenn die Kindheit noch andauert, "had" wenn es sich auf die bereits vergangene Kindheit bezieht) a bad childhood. Charles is
> very jealousy ("jealous" = eifersüchtig, "jealousy" = Eifersucht) of his brother Adam. Charles fought with Adam
> and he went to the army for 5 years. After the 5 years army ("After the five years in the army" oder alternativ "After the five army years")
> he did not want to return home, because he is frighten ("frightened") of
> his brother. So he stays further 5 years in the army. (alternativ "stays 5 more years in the army")) Then
> Adam went (alternativ "traveled") through America and caught by the police. ("And was caught...")  Then he
> went back to his home. But Charles spoke with him and
> wanted to know, whiy (why)  his father had loved him more. Adam
> said thath (that) he never loved his father. Then they plan what
> they will do with the heritage of their father. Then Adam
> get know ("gets to know") a woman whose name is Cathy. Cathy is a bad person,
> but Adam did not know that. She got pregnant and she
> brought 2 siblings in ("into") the world. Then she left him alone
> and she worked as a prostititute ("prostitute"). Then Adam and his chinese
> butler raise (Dauert die Erziehung noch an oder liegt das in der Vergangenheit? Dann "raised") the 2 children. They gave the name of the
> siblings Caleb and Aaron. (Willst du sagen "Sie haben den Geschwistern die Namen Caleb und Aaron gegeben?" Dann "They named the siblings Caleb and Aaron.") Then his butler said to him that
> he should look after a new woman ("to look after" heißt "sich um jemanden kümmern"; jemanden suchen heißt "to look for") or he should regret for
> her. (Was soll der Satz ausdrücken? "to regret" heißt bereuen/bedauern.) THen he wents (Das "s" muss bei "he, she, it" zwar mit, aber nicht in der Vergangenheit. ;-) ) to the brothel and found Cathy. Then
> Cathy said that his brother could be the father of their
> children.
>  
> Then Adam wanted to start a new life. He bought a new car
> and he took care of his children. Then he wrote a letter to
> his brother Chartles (Ich glaube, da ist ein "t" zu viel...) but he got a (eher "the") bad message that his
> brother is dead.
>  
> Then the 2 sons Caleb and Aaron raises ("grow up", oder alternativ "are raised") in brother rivalry.
> They asked themselves, where their mother is. But the
> chinese butler and Adam lied (and said - das "that" kannst du dann weglassen) that their mother is dead. But
> the siblings gehts ("hear") other rumors, that their mother is
> working as a prostitute in Salina.
>  
> Adam Trask lost the most of his money in a bad business
> idea. Aaron wanted to move away and he studied in ("at") the
> university Horvard. (Meintest du Harvard?) He returned back to his father because
> of homesickness. Caleb has known more about his mother and
> he knew that she is a prostitute. If Aaron knows ("knew") that he
> would break inside. Something bad goes in Caleb head (Zum einen "Caleb's head" - und was soll der Satz ausdrücken?) and he
> took Aaron to the brothel, where his mother is working. He
> saw his mother and ran away. Then Cal went to themilitary (the military)
> service. Then Cathy made suicid ("comitted" statt made, und "suicide" mit e am Ende) and Adam cryied ("cried") a lot. The
> whole owner of the heritage of the mother belongs to Aaron. (Was genau soll der Satz ausdrücken? Wenn Aaron das ganze Erbe der Mutter bekommt, würde ich sagen "Aaron is the owner of the whole heritage".)
> Then Adam asked Caled (Caleb) where his brother is and he asked
> similar ("similarly") like (to) Kain (Im Englischen heißt Kain "Cain" mit C) in the bible... .
>  He said Should i ("should" klein, "I" groß) take care of him. But now also Caled ("Caleb") is
> frighten ("is frightened") of his brother.
>  
> After a time Aaron died and his father got ("had") a stroke.
>  
> On the sickbed his father put the blame of the death of
> Aaron
("Aaron's death") on Caleb.
>  


Schönen Gruß und gutes Gelingen beim Vortrag!

mmhkt

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Buchvorstellung: Mitteilung
Status: (Mitteilung) Reaktion unnötig Status 
Datum: 21:39 Mo 22.01.2018
Autor: cheezy

Danke vielen Dank! :)

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